How To Be Confident
Adults Self
The fastest route to confidence is to stop being so attached to one's dignity and seriousness; and plainly admit that one is - of course - an idiot. We all are.
How Not to be Boring
Adults Self
No one is ever boring: we just seem boring when we haven't learnt the surprisingly easy art of being honest about our vulnerabilities.
Why We Don't Really Want to be Nice
Adults Self
Being 'nice' sounds a bit eerie and strange. It shouldn't really.
Is It Better to Be Polite or Frank?
Adults Self
We live in an age that thinks highly of frankness and directness. But there are - nevertheless - a few reasons why politeness remains a hugely important quality.
How We Lie to Ourselves
Adults Self
We are masters at knowing how to lie to ourselves. We pay a heavy price for this self-deception.
The Importance of Vulnerability
Adults Self
We often imagine that what will win us friends and esteem is strength. But surprisingly, it's vulnerability that's at the core of friendship and likeability. This is an invitation to make friends with one's own weaknesses.
Are you a body with a mind or a mind with a body? - Maryam Alimardani
Adults Self
Our bodies - the physical, biological parts of us - and our minds - the thinking, conscious aspects - have a complicated, tangled relationship. Which one primarily defines you or your self? Are you a body with a mind or a mind with a body? Maryam Alimardani investigates.
The Problem With Our Phones
Adults Self
They are hugely useful of course but in many ways, we buy the advantages our phones give us at a subtly high price we don't entirely recognise. Some reflections on how to live well around phones.
How to Process Your Emotions
Adults Self
In order to be calm and at ease with ourselves, we need regular periods where we do something rather strange-sounding: process our emotions. Here is a guide to this essential psychological move.
You Are Not What You Earn
Adults Self
The modern world firmly equates how much we earn with how good, noble, wise and worthy of honour we are. This is a brutal misunderstanding of how salaries are determined. We need to operate with a far more nuanced view of what the money we earn says about us.
How to Remain Calm With People
Adults Self
"One of the most fundamental paths to calm is the power to hold on, even in very challenging situations, to a distinction between what someone does - and what they meant to do....."
What is Emotional Intelligence?
Adults Self
Many of humanity's greatest problems stem not from a shortfall of technical or financial intelligence, but what we term emotional intelligence. It is through the acquisition of Emotional Intelligence that we stand to become better lovers, workers, friends and citizens. We are rarely systematically taught Emotional Intelligence and pay a heavy price for this gap in learning. The School of Life is dedicated to fostering Emotional Intelligence.
How To Forgive
Adults Self
"It can be so hard to forgive because - so often - we simply are in the right and the scale of the folly, thoughtlessness and meanness of others seems utterly beyond our own measure. But there are two inviolable ideas which should nevertheless, in the face of the grossest behaviour, be kept in mind to increase our chances of cutting others a little slack..."
How to practice effectively...for just about anything - Annie Bosler and Don Greene
Adults Self
Mastering any physical skill takes practice. Practice is the repetition of an action with the goal of improvement, and it helps us perform with more ease, speed, and confidence. But what does practice actually do to make us better at things? Annie Bosler and Don Greene explain how practice affects the inner workings of our brains.
Why Only the Happily Single Find True Love
Adults Self
One of the key requirements for having a good chance of finding the right partner is not to mind too much being single.
How to Recount Your Dreams
Adults Self
We often wake up from a dream with a powerful urge to tell those around us about what happened. But our listeners are also liable to feel restless and bored during our narration of the dream. The issue takes us to the heart of the challenges of communication.
What to Do About Being Clumsy
Adults Self
Being clumsy is one of the most humiliating of scenarios. We need to learn to make friends with our 'inner idiot'.
Why we think so much about our hair
Adults Self
We spend an inordinate amount of time thinking about, and in various ways 'styling' our hair. It's not entirely silly; we're trying to tell the world - through the language of keratin strands - about who we are.
The Problem With Perfectionism
Adults Self
We aim for perfection without a correct idea of what perfection might demand from us. To strengthen our resolve, we need to improve our picture of what sacrifices any achievement will demand.
How to Be Charming When Talking About Yourself
Adults Self
It's sometimes assumed that talking too much about ourselves is rude; and asking questions of others is polite and charming. But the distinction is not quite so simple. There are far better and worse ways of speaking about ourselves. We end up charming when we dare to reveal our vulnerabilities to others.
How To Be A Good Listener
Adults Self
Listening is something we're very reluctant to do, not because we're lazy, but because we have never actually been taught how to do it properly, in a way that can be interesting and rewarding for us.